Just saw the date….

And realised it has been well over a month since I posted anything – terrible! Anyone would think I had been busy with kids and work and life or something.

So what has been happening…

The kids have had numerous parties for the end of basketball, school and birthdays. The girl has had her annual concert for the Australian Girls Choir and received her letter that she was progressing a level in that as well. Both kids were involved in the school music concert a few weeks ago, with the girl performing on her violin and singing in the school choir as well. As usual the boy decided to keep his violin playing skills a secret and just sang in the class choir instead.

Today at school the kids find out their new teacher and class for next year. There was much excitement in the air this morning. The boy is adamant that he will have the same teacher as his sister had in the same year, hope there won’t be tears when he finds out that he hasn’t got her. (I know this cos his current teacher has already told me which class he is in – shhh). The girl doesn’t care who her teacher will be, it is not important to her. She already knows which of her friends will be in her class and she is happy that her little group of friends will be with her. They are all lovely girls so hopefully next year will be a good year for her.

And yes, Ritalin does wonders for friendship!

As I write this I am surrounded by chaos here. We leave for the UK in two days to attend a wedding and have Christmas and New Year there as well and we are in the midst of packing. It is very hard trying to figure out what to take and what bags will be used for our luggage and what to take to take on as cabin luggage. I am also trying to figure out how to take tuna on for the kids to eat. I know the airline does kids meals, but I don’t think they do aspergers kids meals. A bit of plain pasta and tomato sauce is all I am asking for! And they do like their plain tuna straight out of the can. Ewwww….

The kids have tried to help pack. The boy pulled out the second biggest suitcase and claimed it as his own. In it he placed some important items he thought he could not do without. This included his drum sticks, a couple of teddy bears, his DS games, a t-shirt and a jumper or two, then he complained that his case looked a bit empty! Hmmm….

The girl just packed her DS games. I wonder if I can be bothered packing more clothes for them?

They are very excited at the thought of spending Christmas in another country – one that has the possibility of snow as well. Santa is NOT so excited at having to deliver presents to another country and giving the parents the headache of bringing said presents home again. Especially when the boy has asked for a Lego Starwars Death Star (whatever the hell that is!). Hmm…. they might find a letter from Santa saying he has hurt his back and couldn’t deliver anything large this year. Do you think that would work?

Off I go to do some more organising.

And remember to pack the Ritalin!








Another night and a battle

We have just finished the night time battle that is bedtime.

I am tired. I don’t want to do this anymore.

After having noise for a while as two children practised their violin at the same time – with different songs, we said it was bedtime.

An hour later we got them to their bedrooms.  I completely lost it at this point – I was sick of the noise and the fighting and neither of them was listening to a word I said. I yelled, the boy collapsed in tears and the girl shrieked back!  That was worth it.

Both kids were finally in bed and the boy’s reader was done and spelling words practised for his test tomorrow. All was quiet.

Then the girl starts crying because she has to get out of bed to go to the toilet. She can never go to the toilet before she goes to bed, because she will need to go again AFTER she reads her book.

Except it is too cold to get out of bed. Never mind that she is now lying on the bed without any covers on her anyway. She doesn’t get that if she got up quickly she could have gone to the toilet and been back in bed before she knew it.

The man has been trying to reason with her for a few minutes now, and doing everything except dance on the roof to get her out of her bed. Eventually he gives up and leaves. Unfortunately I am now up and in her room where I pull the girl out of her bed and drag her to the toilet. She trips over her foot and is now crying more. I hate that I get so angry that I yell and make her worse.

Now the boy is wide awake and the girl is crying and both us parents are mad. I yell at her more and thank her for upsetting the whole family. I can’t stop it….

She gets back into bed sobbing saying that we hate her. My heart is now breaking and I hug her tight.

As she is about to drift off to sleep she rolls back over to look at me.

‘I haven’t brushed my teeth yet…..’

Lucky I have wine tonight.

A sad one

Lets hope I don’t offend anyone too much – probably will, but I didn’t mean it. I promise!!

Sometimes I hate other people and their kids. And by this I mean people I know and like and am really good friends with.

I hate their perfect children, and their perfect lives, and their perfect talents. Children who will not hit and kick other children for the sake of it, who will help their parents sometimes, who don’t have a bedtime routine which is 2 hours long. The list goes on…

I don’t like that I hate them. It is not a nice feeling. Especially when they are  friends of mine. Is it possible to love and hate someone at the same time??

Sometimes I just want to sink into the ground and hide. If I just stay at home and don’t go into the world then I can’t get hurt and my children don’t get hurt.

Their children are nice and they get good reports and they get chosen for plays and teams and parties and playdates…. the list goes on. Their parents don’t have a ball of anxiety in their stomach every afternoon when they go to pick up their children. They even let their mums brush their hair and put them in clothes that might itch!!! (The girl refuses to wear the school jumper because it hurts her skin)

Meanwhile the man and I do our best to get through every day with as few meltdowns and tantrums as possible and get no reward for it. We work hard and are good people – and life sucks!

Bitter much?

I know my children are talented in so many ways, I am just waiting for it to be recognised. It drives me crazy that the boy is exceptionally good at playing the violin but he won’t perform in front of anyone. So his dad and I and his violin teacher are the only ones who know it. I just want to show him off. My problem, I know.

I could go on and on about the girl being overlooked for things because of her past behaviour. I feel it has tainted everything now. Look past the behaviour to see the child please.

For those reading this who do know me, please know that I do like you and your children, and I am pleased for them when something good happens to them. Really.

Just have a big chip on my shoulder.

Please keep talking to me about your children – it is my problem, not yours!!

The boy and how far he has come

Yesterday the boy got a Principal’s Award from school. I know all the children end up with them over the course of their school life but it marked for his dad and I how far he has come. He received it because he had settled into Year 2 very well and was working hard and doing his best in class. He struggles a bit at schooling, so this was a big achievement for him.

He has had a few problems, he is still trying to overcome some but he is getting there.

We can now take his photograph. There was a time that he would immediately hide if someone took out a camera. There is a gap in the photo albums between the ages of 2 and 7. All we had of him was the back of his head, or just a blur as he tried to run from the photographer.

He nows makes up plays with his sister and performs them at family get togethers. This would never happened 12 months ago – but he is quite happy to get up at gatherings and make up impromptu plays. Although as there is never any direction these plays tend to go on a bit and we adults zone out after a while…..

He is in more control of his temper. He has been an angry little boy for quite some time and his dad and I have had to do a lot of work for him to learn to control it. There has been many times when I have gone through the checklist on his anger sheet and asked him to count to ten, only for him to shout at me ‘NO, YOU COUNT TO TEN YOU STUPID IDIOT’!! Hmm… not the result we were after at the time. He has grown into his body and is not a mass of anger anymore. We are not waiting to get punched when telling him off anymore. It was a bit scary but (fingers crossed) we are past it.

He plays the violin and is really good at it. He picked it up straightaway and the teacher can’t believe how good he is. Unfortunately he won’t practise infront of anyone – so if you want to hear him play you will have to stand on the other side of his closed bedroom door. I have to lie and tell him that the sound doesn’t travel. So so far, nobody else knows how good he is.

He is still shy and unsure of new situations. He was a ball of nerves for the first few weeks of school this year. He still refuses to get up and play at the music concert, and insists that he will not be going onstage at the school concert in a few months. We will get him on there, we just need to do a lot of work beforehand.

I still get lots of cuddles from him. He is a very affectionate and caring little boy. He told us after school yesterday that he recieved a sticker from a teacher because he asked another little boy who was crying to come and play with him and made him happy again.

He still hides behind me when he is out of his comfort zone, but I can see the work we have been doing with him paying off.


Still here

I have forgotten about writing – just too much going on to sit still for too long.
Lots of meltdowns over homework, school, getting dressed… and that is just me.
Wine is featuring heavily (it’s ok my cyber stalker, I don’t have a drinking problem, and I only have a drink when the kids are in bed)
Lots of sleepless nights over kids, money, kids behaviours etc… the usual.
Tonight I had to help the girl finish a story on Jonah and the whale. Not what I really felt like doing after already getting her to do her homework, spelling words and violin practise. Anyway want to quiz me on Jonah now? Huh? Anyone???
So, still here and I will be back to posting again shortly.